For the cast members on Jersey Shore: Family Vacation, what happens in Vegas does not stay in Vegas.
It gets broadcast to millions of viewers each week!
Indeed, Ronnie, Pauly, Sitchy and company returned with TWO brand new episodes on Thursday night, kicking off Season 2 in grand, intense and adorable fashion.
The bulk of these installments centered on Ronnie Ortiz-Magro and his occasionally-violent girlfriend Jen Harley welcoming their daughter into the world.
But Ronnie was actually in London for the blessed event, flying back to Sin City as soon as he learned Harley was in labor.
Pauly D was already there, however, and was actually the first member of the crew to meet precious little Ariana.
Shortly after this life-transforming development, however, Jen and Ronnie got into the ultimate social media fight (see slideshow below).
This prompted Vinny and Mike to fly to Nevada for a guys' night out in order to figure out was the heck happening with Ronnie.
The new father acted as if everything was totally cool and said he and Harley were together and on solid terms and, oh, also: he didn't want to to go a strip club.
WHAT?!?!?
Elsewhere, JWoww was also in an intriguing place in life.
Her two-year-old son was not yet talking and was therefore attending therapy three times a week. She was trying to handle it as best she could.
For Mother’s Day husband Roger Mathews asked all of her friends to send in a 30-second video so he could create something to cheer her up.
When only The Situation participated, though, Jenni wanted to call out Snooki, upset that her BFF didn't play a role in this gift.
However, the confrontation got put on the backburner when Deena Cortese announced she was pregnant while they were all at lunch. How exciting!
Snooki also noted that she had been hanging out a bit with Angelina Pivarnick, despite her having recently labeled JWOWW a "whore" on social media.
She even said she had invited the controversial ex-cast member to Vegas.
On the second half of the premiere, meanwhile, the drama truly picked up.
It actually got very serious and potentially dangerous.
After receiving a text from Harley that made him angry, Ronnie got wasted and nearly attacked someone at a pool party, at least reminding long-time viewers that he hasn't changed much.
Back at the hotel, the muscle-bound tough guy actually broke down in tears and at last opened up to the roommates about what was going on.
Since they had arrived in Vegas, he had been saying that everything was good with Harley -- but that was just to keep her happy.
In reality, Ronnie explained that he didn’t want to talk badly about the mother of his child (which is news to us, considering some of what he's said) and then he cried.
And he cried and he cried.
When he broke down, his friend told him they needed to know what was happening so they could try to be of some assistance.
So Ronnie finally told them everything. It all came out, folks.
“I’m scared of losing my f-cking daughter," he said, continuing:
"Jen, she’s irrational, she’s capable of taking the baby and going away. Everything I say is on a thread with her...
“I’m gonna f-cking get crucified for this. I’ve been going through hell.”
Later, in the confessional, he added:
“When we fight, she has kept the baby from me for five days, six days. It’s like, I won’t even know where my daughter is.”
JWOWW was sympathic, but she also told Ronnie that if he’s concerned about not seeing his daughter, he shouldn’t be posting mean things about her mom on Instagram.
That's a fair point, isn't it?
“Every move that I make, I’m scared that my daughter’s gonna be gone,” he yelled.
But Jenni had a solution:
“Leave her and fight for your daughter, and then go get help. Go to the court, go get a lawyer,” she told him, bringing up how her son couldn't speak and that he should be grateful he has a healthy kid.
When Ronnie replied he has "nothing," Jenni really let him have it:
You chose that life. You f-cked a crazy bitch. You got a crazy bitch pregnant!
Ah, good times.
Who out there didn't miss all of these people?!?
Jersey Shore: Family Vacation airs on MTV on Thursdays at 8/7c.
You can watch Jersey Shore: Family Vacation online right here if you need to catch up:
